Birthday flowers from a very sweet husband

Beautiful, aren't they?

Healthy habits for Tuesday, January 30

So sad - my Sobriety Birthday - and my answer is ...no. I didn't make the list yesterday...

That's ok, I'm really feeling awful with this crud, and I know I'm still on a mission to improve myself and my life. So it's all good.

I think today all I will be missing is hitting my knees in the AM (I felt so bad when I woke up, it was hard to stay up long enough to get the kids ready for school) and 'moving my body'.

So that is cool - sick as a dog, and I'll just be missing two things - I'm impressed!

I'll check in in the AM and let ya know if I make it... no reason I shouldn't!

Sobriety - Welcome to the land of the living

Although uncomfortably ill with some chest congestion crud today, I am, also - just plain glad to be alive.

Grateful to be alive.

And grateful to be alive - in the land of the living.

What I used to do I would not call living. It was nothing short of pure Hell!

You see - today is my birthday. Nope, not my belly-button birthday.

It's my AA birthday - I have been sober for 15 years today!

Totally awesome and totally amazing! I love God - He ROCKS!

I would have more profound and wonderful things to say about it all, but, I'm a few sandwiches short of a picnic today! LOL!

Just feeling really horrible!

But I'm happy to be sober!!

Healthy habits for Monday, January 29

Nope - still feeling like poo.

Monkey poo.

blah.

Healthy habits for Sat & Sun, January 27-28

Not done.

But mostly done.

I got sick, and you know how when you get sick all normal things kind of fall by the wayside.

I did try to do as much as possible, but, it didn't really amount to much.

I am feeling a bit better, but, still pretty crappy.

Healthy habits for Fri, January 26

Done!

Well - sort of - I forgot to hit my knees in the morning - so I did it at 1pm.

And then, of course, again at bedtime.

Today is tricky, though, because I woke up feeling really awful with a sinus infection.

Tomorrow's report might not be so great.

Healthy habits for Thurs, January 25

Not done.

Total bummer...

Let's see - first off, I forgot to hit my knees in the morning, so I did it at 1pm. LOL! I am sure God is happy I'm checking in, anytime of day - but, well - it sure helps starting your day off with it instead of halfway through your day...

Then - you know, come to think of it, this morning I realized that I may have forgotten to hit my knees at bedtime, too. I really can't remember - but, I went to bed a bit late, and really tired - and since I can't remember - I bet I didn't.

The other thing I missed was getting my body moving - total bummer!

Puppy was none too happy about it, either! LOL! I could see him getting excited and expecting that we were going about the same time we go every day - and I felt so bad, but, I was still busy on the computer. Hopefully we'll make it today!

Healthy habits for Wed, January 24

Done!

The weird thing was that Puppy and I went the same exact way we've been going on our walks every day - and for some reason, I got a cramp in my side this time. Weird.

Maybe my body is just starting to feel it or something - oh heck, I don't know...

I do have to admit I took a diet pill yesterday and I really shouldn't take those things! They give me such bad indigestion, I feel like I'm dying!

Not to mention, they have ephedra in them, although it's been argued that it's safe now - who can tell?

And maybe, or no, really - not even maybe - I really just shouldn't be taking them with my psychiatric medication. I didn't ask the doctor, because I didn't want him to tell me no.

Now how mature is that? This affects all parts of my health - my spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical! If I'm sort of being sneaky to take it, etc. Not good.

But - this blog is for reporting and recording my steps in this journey, and so I am going to honestly do that.

I only have one or two of those pills left - thank goodness - so even if I do it again, I can only do it again one or two more times!

The funny thing is, I bought them at the health food store. When people were dying from these things, it's like - "Come buy our products at the health food store - to die." uh..yeah.

I just love the energy level and stamina I get from them. But I know that with all of my efforts, my energy level and stamina will increase! So that's cool!

Goodbye pretty pink packets!

Yep - I did it! I went off the artificial sweeteners. I was mostly having them in my coffee (I'm pretty much an all-day drinker...we might need to work on that one) and in many, many diet Coke's per day!

I also drink Sprite - often mixing the two..mmmm! Well, one day I just decided to drop the pink packets altogether!

I knew that meant I would be ingesting a lot more sugar, as I drink soda and coffee all day long, but, I also know that the stuff is really bad for you - so it would be well worth it.

I also knew that as I trudge along this road, I will be seeking to replace more and more of my bad habits (like all-day coffee) with good habits (like all-day water, perhaps). So although, a funny step in the right direction, I knew it was the way to go.

And what is really funny is that something I've always heard and never fully believed happened.

I've always heard that people who ingest artificial sweeteners have a tendency to be overweight, and when quitting the evil-cancer-producing-oh-so-deceptive-pretty-pink-packet - they lose weight!

Well, I had sort of noticed some weight loss since we have been out here in Alabama, but, not a whole lot. When I kicked the pink packets out - in a week, I swear! A week! I noticed a difference in my weight loss!

Simply amazing! They weren't lying to me all those years.

It really felt so bassackwards when I did it, you know, because I want to be moving in a positive direction with my health. And ingesting more sugar doesn't exactly seem positive. But I could just feel it - that it was the right thing to do.

Funny how life is like that sometimes.

Healthy habits for Tuesday, January 23

Done!

And you know, I meant to put on the to-do list, have at least one serving of fruits or veggies per day (I know- I'm bad, but, hey - I'm taking baby steps here...)

I think I'll go add that to the list.

Healthy habits for Monday, January 22

Done!

I had a migraine, so Puppy and I just went on a short walk - but, we got moving! And the hills in this neighborhood had both of us huffing and puffing - even on a short walk. My head is much clearer today, not completely gone, but, almost - so hopefully we'll go longer.

And I didn't drink my water until right before bedtime - ugh! - I knew I was going to regret it, but, I wanted to get my to-do list 'right' the first day, at least! LOL!

Oh, and I got all cozy in my bed, sitting up reading my book (and I was freezing, so under the covers was a good place to be!) when I realized I hadn't hit my knees! Yep - outta that warm bed I came! LOL!

Hopefully I'll do better today. ...but, if not, we'll try again tomorrow!

Healthy Habits List

• Hit your knees in the morning
• Hit your knees at night
• Drink at least one two bottles of water (edited 2/23/07)
  
• Eat at least one three servings of fruit or veggies per day (edited 2/19/07)
  
• Move your body! However small, just MOVE!
• Read daily meditation book

Wow, that is small now that I see it in black and white. Well, that's ok, it's a good place to start.

And hopefully, things will get lots better and I can make it a longer list!

I will check in once a day to report if the list was met the day before.

My journey back to health

I've been of a mind to get myself back to where I need to be spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, really - ever since we came out to Alabama.

Moving out here was kind of a symbol of that for me, in an odd sort of way. I suppose it could be argued that it was just a 'geographical cure' - but, to me, it really doesn't seem that way.

You see, I'm 36 years old, and I've never 'left home'. Always in the watchful shadow of my family, constantly turning to them when I'm in a jam. Ok, I am still turning to them, but, it's something that at this point I can't really explain well.

But ever since I was 18 years old, I have been afraid to leave.

It's funny, I've been afraid to do things all my life. When I was in the first grade, the class was having a party at a local restaurant called Next Door. It was a cute little restaurant. I can't believe I thought this way, but, I remember thinking that since the kids would be in a different environment, not stuck in school with me, stuck in the classroom with me - that none of them would talk to me. And I was terrified to go. My mom tried to talk me into it, but, I just was not budging.

And every time I passed that restaurant for the next almost-30 years until they tore it down recently, it was a glaring symbol of my fear - and wondering what I'd missed.

I've gone through most of my whole life that way. Avoiding - out of fear - staying safe - and missing out on who-knows-what.

So that is what the whole move is about for me - finally being true to myself. Finally strapping on that parachute and jumping. It's not about the kids or Mark, or our family, not even about the opportunity to buy this house from his mother. It's about my not having to drive by a restaurant that I was afraid to go to - and wonder what I missed, how much fun I could have had, what friends I could have connected with....

That damn restaurant haunted me for almost 30 years. I hated it for a long time.

And then I grew to appreciate it - because it gently reminded me to go ahead and live.

And I was actually pretty upset when they tore it down. Wait! That's my personal, emotional recovery symbol - you can't take that from me!

Ha! Imagine that - first I refuse to go there, then I wind up longing for it not to be torn down!

Funny these odd circles life takes us in, eh?

*****

I'm sure I'll do lots more gabbing on the subject of where I've let myself get to and the mistakes that led me here and what I plan to do about it, but, basically - I've gotten to a place in life where I'm not being TRUE TO LISA. I've covered up a lot of who I am with safety buffers - bad habits that have become coping mechanisms. I'm staying safe, and not happy. It's no fun. I'm sick to death of it.

So this blog is all about BECOMING WHO I AM. I am not aiming to become something that I'm not. I am aiming to become more naturally who I am. Becoming true to the nature of Lisa - hence the name ....NATURALLY LISA.

I want to have a daily to-do list that I will do my best to do every day. I know that some days it just won't happen, and that's ok. There was a fabulous article in Reader's Digest that said one very important step in bettering yourself is Plan to Fail. Because if you don't plan for it, and you fail - then you blow the whole thing off and smoke like a fiend, eat up the whole fridge, drink all night - whatever your bad habits are. So I am fully aware that my to-do list might not happen every day - and I am ok with that. When I fail, I will just dust myself off, and get back on that purdy horse!!

The to-do list is going to start out small, so that I don't make myself crazy by expecting too much of myself all at once. The next post will be the to-do list and I'll link to it in the sidebar.

Where are we going?

Just where are we going on this blog?

Although life is all about the journey - we have a destinational goal, and that would be:

HAPPY, JOYOUS, and FREE

Yep, that's where we're headed - come on along if you want! We might just have a great time 'getting there'.

You know, I knew all that about the journey crap even as a kid - it's kind of funny, because - I used to love all the bus rides - all the 'getting there' times in my childhood. They were a blast!

Sure - the actual places were great - but, the 'getting there' - that was a blast!!

So come on!